Unwed Un-Bliss
I experienced my Very Worst Date a few years ago, after some of my gal pals conspired to set me up with a guy they knew. He seemed like an all-around nice, even-keel, normal guy, and we went on several dates, usually just having dinner or catching a movie together. It was incredibly laid-back.
After a month or so, I invited him to come as my plus-one to a wedding reception. On the way there, he confessed he was a little nervous about being in a room full of strangers. I assured him that he’d be fine but he insisted that he was really anxious, and made noises about not wanting to go. I made the mistake of dismissing this as butterflies and we went, anyway.
As soon as we got there, he morphed into this incredibly rude, awkward stranger, and when he wasn’t glued to my side and completely silent, he kept cracking really inappropriate jokes about other people’s clothes, hair and mannerisms. When the food arrived, he practically inhaled his first course salad, only pausing in his frantic chewing to chug his wine. Before anyone at our table could really register what was going on with him, he announced that he felt sick, leaned forward, and threw up all over the tablecloth. Almost the entire room noticed, and those that didn’t certainly noticed when he went running to the bathroom!
After he’d cleaned up (and the waiters had stripped our table, much to the annoyance of those we were sitting with), he insisted that I immediately drive him home. The whole drive, he complained that he’d warned me and that it was unforgivable I’d still “forced” him to go to the reception when he’d been so incredibly nervous. Then, as icing on the cake, he demanded that I come in and spend the rest of the evening with him at his place, because he was going to be lonely and it’d been “my fault” he’d gotten sick in the first place!
Needless to say, I went back to the reception, and I’m still not sure I’ve forgiven the friends who set me up with him.
