Picture Imperfect

myviv

One of my Very Worst Dates happened on my fourth date with a guy who was funny, warm and witty (plus all the shallow stuff: tall, blonde, great body etc). The first two dates had gone fantastically well. We had quite a bit of email and phone contact in between and were getting along really well. At the end of the third date, we had a lingering kiss. It was far as we had gone at that point though the festivities looked very likely to heat up on our next encounter.

For our fourth date, we went to a bar for drinks and tapas. Again, everything was going great. I make it a policy to never play around with my cellphone on a date but I was expecting an urgent work call. I explained this and he was fine with it so I had my phone, set to silent, on the table.

He excused himself to go to the restroom for what seemed like a long time. While he was away, I got a little ‘beep’ on my phone to let me know I had a message. It wasn’t work but a message from him. Thinking it was maybe a suggestive “can’t wait to kiss you again/you’re looking great” type message, I opened it.

I was nonplussed to find that it was a close up picture of his (not inconsiderable, I might add) fully ‘alert’ male member, clearly taken in the restroom because his suit pants could just be seen in the picture. That’s how close up it was! I like to think I am pretty open-minded but it came as quite a shock to me that some serious flirtation and a pretty intense kiss had prompted the X-rated photographic effort!

About two minutes later, he came charging back into the bar looking like he was about to throw up. Before I had a chance to say a word, he launched into a garbled apology.

“Oh my god, I am so sorry, I can’t believe I did that, I don’t know what I was thinking….What a stupid thing to do…What a stupid mistake to make…”

Ok so far, I thought.

Then, he continued.

“I sent it to the wrong person in my address book!”

There may be only one thing worse than a date you have only kissed but have high hopes for sending you shots of his penis from the bar restroom. That would be the date you have only kissed but have high hopes for sending SOMEONE ElSE his penis pix from the bar restroom while on he’s on a date with you.

August 11th, 2009 in Problematic Point of No Return, Tech (In)Compatibility, WTF?

Comments (19)

Say Cheese!August 11th, 2009 at 4:43 pm

Did you ever get an explanation? Surely this isn’t some guy thing where they send each other penis pics, right?

karenAugust 11th, 2009 at 8:55 pm

If he’s that stupid enough to do that while he’s out with you, I’d run and get the heck out of Dodge. (i.e. the date)

CCAugust 12th, 2009 at 4:51 am

This is hilarious.

rawrAugust 12th, 2009 at 6:16 am

Okay, so at first, I was wondering why the hell dudes think showing their dates unsolicited photos of their dicks was a way to to get/keep a date. Then I read more and was wondering who the hell he was intending to send that picture to and why he just couldn’t wait to sext whoever it was like a horny high schooler. Seems like you dodged a bullet, there.

P.S. Am I the only woman in the history of ever that doesn’t find blond hair on guys to be attractive? I have blond hair and people tend to be attracted to people that look somewhat similar to them, but I’ve always been a fan of dark haired dudes. Just curious, is all.

CCAugust 12th, 2009 at 9:55 am

I’m also a blonde woman and I am attracted to brunette men, primarily. My brother had blonde hair, too, and we are very close, so I think blonde me remind me too much of him, heh

shamilliaAugust 12th, 2009 at 10:17 am

maybe he was sending the pic to his doctor?

wlsAugust 12th, 2009 at 12:20 pm

It’s so much worse because (from the sounds of it) he didn’t seem sleazy to begin with. Wow, just. . . wow. I just can’t believe he actually told you that he meant to someone else. I wonder what he expected out of the date after that.
P.S. As a blonde from a family of blondes, I’ve never been interested in blonde guys either – too weird.

JBMAugust 12th, 2009 at 1:19 pm

I wonder if he regretted sending it, and his not so bright excuse was to say that wasn’t for you not thinking it would be worse saying that. The OP said he was “witty” though, so that probably wasn’t it. Then again he was blonde…

ChellAugust 12th, 2009 at 9:44 pm

That is amazing. I love that he thought it explained it all!

ClaireAugust 13th, 2009 at 8:26 am

Frightening and hilarious!

Was this in Philadelphia? I feel like I know this guy.

CanaduckAugust 14th, 2009 at 2:46 pm

This is one of the funniest entries on this site!

DeidreAugust 15th, 2009 at 3:47 am

That is ferociously unnecessary. Although fuhilarious in hindsight.

DCAugust 21st, 2009 at 1:47 am

See, that’s when I start looking around for the hidden camera. A WTF?? moment, indeed.

Frau BlucherAugust 22nd, 2009 at 9:33 pm

eeeeeewwww!!!
unless he was sending it to his urologist…RUN AWAAAAAYYYY

70808August 25th, 2009 at 5:05 am

This was my date, and the ‘explanation’ -such that it was- was that he and his ex girlfriend (very similar name, so right after me in his address book) who split up years ago are still in touch, good mates and nothing more and (upon request, when the other is single and feeling a bit of frustrated) sporadically sex text explicit pictures to each other to supply a visual aid when ‘taking matters into their own hands’. Personalised porn on request!

PS, Not Philadelphia, but is worrying to think there may be more than one around!

LisaSeptember 2nd, 2009 at 3:21 pm

I love this..and his explaination ! He sounds very like someone I dated briefly here in England- (very fond of sending genital pics, close ‘platonic’ links to ex girlfriends (yawn)…but he topped that- we’d been seeing each other for a few months and after we’d had sex he went to the kitchen and my phone beeped- and there was a close up picture of MY genitalia that he’d thoughtfully taken on his phone without my knowledge/consent..sharp exit leaving one smashed phone- he still “can’t understand what he did wrong”..

Franz:PSeptember 27th, 2009 at 7:07 am

eeeeeewwww!!!
unless he was sending it to his urologist…RUN AWAAAAAYYYY

maybe he was sending the pic to his doctor?

—
Yeah with a message saying “can’t wait to kiss you again/you’re looking great”.

KillerJanuary 22nd, 2010 at 4:01 am

“I have blond hair and people tend to be attracted to people that look somewhat similar to them”

In fact the opposite is true. That’s the reason why here in Europe in mediterrean countries where people tend to be darker, blondes are queens, while in more northern countries, darker girls from Italy and Spain, often referred to as ‘latinas’, are being more sought after. Nature does it this way because diversification makes up for stronger genes in children. Too similar genes in parents amplify weaknesses and so on. That’s why you are not supposed to sleep with family members.