Tool Time
I had the worst date of my life when I was 23. I had just gone through a horrendous breakup and was really not in the right frame of mind to be dating, so of course, when I got a message on MySpace from a semi-cute guy who “just wanted to talk,” I was all about it. My first clue should’ve been that he wanted to call me 30 minutes after he got my first message and my second clue should’ve been that after making plans, he kept me on the phone for the next 45 minutes. While on my way to meet him, he told me he had no gas, and even though he had money for gas, he would probably end up using it to buy an energy drink the next day instead. He had no money for anything else, including our date.
So we met up and I drove us to a bar that had live music. Once inside, he got a Bud Light. I asked the bartender if they had any Guinness. My date asked me what else I drink, and I told him, “Mostly Irish and British beers, no liquor.” To this, he responded, “Oh, I usually just stick with Bud Light. I’m not one of those people who worry about their image all the time.” He pulled me around from one band to another at this place and ended up talking to a gigantic group of people, but didn’t introduce me to any of them so I told him I was tired and we need to leave.
On the way back, he told me how awesome the band Tool is and asked me if I was into them. I told him I do like them, but I’m not one of those crazy dedicated fans. He said, “Oh, yeah, I LOVE Tool. No offense, but I feel like some of the lyrics probably just go over your head.” That was strike three. I dropped him off at his car and then stupidly answered the phone when he called me (thinking maybe he’d gotten into an accident or something). No, he just wanted to talk at me for another 45 minutes. He had no earthly idea why I wouldn’t answer his calls, texts or MySpace messages after that.
