An Alternative
A few years ago, I went out with a guy at work who was cute and nice and smart…and VERY wholesome. We started our date at a small city museum in his neighborhood. (He lived in a neighborhood that is known for embracing alternative lifestyles. I thought it was fairly progressive of such a sheltered guy to choose to live in a neighborhood with such a robust gay community and colorful population.) I chose to wear a sundress, since it was a date and all, but he showed up in shorts and a ratty baseball cap. I figured it was just a misunderstanding and tried not to feel overdressed.
At the museum we ran into my former roommate. The last contact I’d had with her was when she dropped out of school because of bipolar disorder and paranoid delusions. She’d moved out of our apartment, stealing most of my clothes, while accusing me of trying to ruin her life. She said hello and started to chat, and I tried to be pleasant because there was no need for drama while I was on a first date.
We left the museum and had lunch. It was a warm day, so we went for a walk to a small but popular park. Walking around the park he was visibly uncomfortable, steering me away from anyone not dressed like a Midwestern tourist. There were many other people there, including couples from all kinds of lifestyles and all walks of life. Finally, he turned to me and said, “I can’t stand all the crazies.” I gave him a quizzical look. He looked from side to side, leaned in and said in a stage whisper, “You know, the GAYS.”
I took it as the final sign that this date was just not meant to be. I suddenly “remembered” I had a previous commitment that I couldn’t miss, and I got out of there as fast as I could!
