Modern Romance

I recently moved to another country and decided to give online dating a try as a way to meet locals. Soon afterwards, I received a nice introductory poem from an attractive man. He was a bit older than my preferred age range but, I figured, he was charming and it could be fun to give him a chance. We exchanged emails for two weeks before finally arranging a date at a scenic park. I was instantly attracted to him; he was cute, athletic, sarcastic and really interesting. He told me I was beautiful and asked to see me the following day. On our second date he didn’t let me talk and we didn’t have a great conversation, but I gave him one last chance.

For our final date we met up at the Tate Modern because I’ve always appreciated seeing great works of art. Before arranging the date, I mentioned that he didn’t have to come if he wouldn’t enjoy it. He reassured me that he wanted to spend the day with me. Sadly, the entire time there, this 33-year-old man acted like a spoiled four year old. He criticized almost every painting and sculpture, declaring how everything was “complete bullocks.” I tried to share my interpretation on several pieces and he remarked that I was stupid and the entire gallery was useless. There were people around and I was so embarrassed that I remained speechless while he spoke to me in an argumentative tone. We went outside the museum and he continued to belittle my views until I finally couldn’t take the abuse anymore.

I turned to him and said, “I don’t think we have enough in common”. He looked confused because this was the first time that I really stood up for myself. He mumbled, “Okay I’ll call you” and kissed me on the cheek. As he was walking off, I yelled after him “NO, don’t call me!” and walked the opposite direction.

Being single is lonely but at least I can enjoy the Tate with my art-loving friends.

June 15th, 2010 in Just Plain Pathetic, Mid-Courtship Disaster, Problematic Point of No Return, WTF? | tags: , , ,
Comments (12)
tronnerJune 15th, 2010 at 8:00 am

Oh jeez – lovely guy there, but were his hands the appropriate firmness? I’m not sure why I liked this one so much. I guess it just flowed right and I got the feeling the OP didn’t have to struggle to make the date sound bad.

zomboidJune 15th, 2010 at 8:50 am

that’s ‘bollocks’ (not bullocks)

zomboidJune 15th, 2010 at 8:51 am

a person can also be described as a complete bollocks, this guy sounds like one

Frau BlucherJune 15th, 2010 at 10:43 am

if he’s only 33 and like that…imagine him at 50! eeucch.

YGJune 15th, 2010 at 11:23 am

No question why he’s single, then. Berating and critising your views and thoughts is an act of control. If only you’d kneed him in the nuts…that would’ve been a fitting end to a wasted date.

AndrewJune 15th, 2010 at 11:23 am

Someone sounds like a twat-waffle.

TangerineJune 15th, 2010 at 12:36 pm

I’m reasonably convinced this story was written about my ex boyfriend who lives in London, is 33 and acts like a 4-year-old constantly. This describes many of our dates, though he waited until a few months into the relationship to start acting like such a spaz. If it is him, trust me – you’re lucky to have escaped when you did. :)

DuncanJune 15th, 2010 at 3:15 pm

Of course, there are a number of galleries with whole rooms worth of depictions of Europa with Zeus. Many’s the time I’ve overheard people wonder aloud ‘how did they get the bulls to sit still long enough to paint them’. ‘Aha’, I say, ‘that’s bullocks’.

Seriously though; going to the Tate just to hate on stuff doesn’t make you a bad person. I dislike most contemporary abstract painting and thoroughly despite ‘conceptual art’; philistines have feelings to. Still, if it’s important to you perhaps you should try approaching people either in the Tate itself or via your ‘art loving friends’ if it’s something you particularly enjoy.

rawrJune 15th, 2010 at 4:55 pm

There’s a difference between hating on stuff for fun and being argumentative and belittling somebody and calling them stupid because they like something you don’t like. That’s fine he doesn’t like it, but if that was the case, why did he go with her? It wasn’t hard to figure out she liked the art there if she invited him there and she even gave him an out if he didn’t want to go. And even if he did go simply for the sake of being argumentative, knowing that he didn’t like the type of art there, who the hell wants to date somebody who likes being so contradictory? That’s just annoying.

geialgJune 16th, 2010 at 2:27 am

I’m pretty sure I’ve dated this guy or his identical twin. Sympathy! Nothing wrong with poking fun at modern art, but, like rawr says, there’s a way to do it without belittling the person you’re supposed to be trying to impress.

YGJune 16th, 2010 at 4:26 am

He probably didn’t understand any of it and felt threatened or that she’d see him as less than intelligent, hence his aggressive, controlling behaviour. Admittedly, with some of the stuff at the Tate, it leaves even me scratching my head (and I “get” a lot of modern art, even if I think it’s utter rubbish…I can still understand it). But to act like a 4-year-old in a museum when you’re not 4…

Then again, I once dated a guy who spent three hours looking at two rooms of 11th century art…I was ready to run screaming through the gallery!

hipsterJune 16th, 2010 at 9:08 am

^Haha that’s actually pretty hilarious YG. Then again don’t so many guys have something they completely obsess over and put on a pedestal that we girls completely can’t fathom?

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