Taking A Hike

my personal five-star checklist: cringing for OP for having gone through this- check, no idea what outcome will be as I read- check, literally saying “wtf”- check, secretly hoping bad date will get what’s coming to him- check, thinking ‘pheew! thank goodness that never happened to me’- check!

five star awarding checklist*

@Thandi, I felt the same way while reading it. This was a very cringe-inducing story. Luckily it all worked out for OP in the long-run.

But seriously, what a creepball for stalking your number.

Also, that’s really irresponsible of the school to allow access to personal contact information like that to “select individuals.”

Do they not have student directories with phone numbers anymore? My undergrad and grad schools had directories with phone number, address and email address along with the persons major. Back in “the day” (appx 1900 to 6/21/2010) it was hardly considered stalking for someone to look up your phone number in said directory and give you a call. It was actually considered a polite form of communication. Much more polite than…”lol, u wanna c m3 2nite, ur hawt, w00t”.

I guess the way she worded it, saying that only a select few were able to access this information is what made me go off on that tangent. At my undergrad you could access our e-mail addresses but that was it.

True – it was more a diatribe on the method of communication nowadays than it was about the OP’s story.

I liked the story – well written and one of those sort of embarrassing events that sort of leave you wondering what happened, especially with the roommate.

red flag-he has your # w/o giving it to. what a jerk. who would want to marry someone like him? perhaps someone desperate?

Never mind the fact that he ignored the OP not only for the entire hike, but pretty much forever to hit on her roommate. And then years later, when engaged to a friend of the OP he pretends to not know her. Of course, given how much attention he paid to her during the hike (do we even dare call this a date?), he really didn’t know her.

Hey, everybody! I’m the OP. Glad you liked the story. Just wanted to clarify that the campus directory that I mentioned had pretty limited access. Most everyone I knew had their information listed as “unlisted,” so nobody could look you up–unless they had a campus job that was a need-to-know basis and had agreed to the FERPA guidelines (Federal Educational Rights and Privacy Act–google it). That means this kid violated those guidelines. Why didn’t I report him? I really should have!

And yes, I’m perfectly happy that it worked out for me. I’m married and have a 2-year-old. Life is great

ewww…what a creepy little loser!

Gotcha.

Don’t you love how on this website we tend to pick the most inane part of the story & debate it to death?

It always surprises me at the depth of creepiness some dudes have. Not only did this guy obtain your number through illegal means, but he then stalked your roommate. Did she have a problem with him- how skeevy did things get there?

On my first point (which I’m beating to a pulp, I know), it is sort of interesting how fast our society went from where you could just find a person’s name in a phone book or directory and call them. It may have been uncomfortable in dealing with a phone call from a creeper, but it was also pretty normal to have people call you out of the blue. Nowadays, most people aren’t listed. I doubt I’m even IN a phone book and any directory is tied to my work number – or email. When I get a call I don’t recognize I usually ignore it – and that’s normal – everyone does it. Four or five years ago (ok, maybe 9 or 10), you just answered the phone and the people that screened phone calls were beaten with bags of oranges. That said, it’s gross that someone felt he had to break the law just to find out more about you. It makes you wonder what else he has used the directory for.

It’s also funny how he broke the law to find her, & then completely ignored her. Nimrod.

I wish I didn’t have a mouthful of food when I read @tronner’s first comment.

I’d bet good money that this happened at BYU.

…Holy crap. Did you go to BYU?

I think I had that exact same experience once at that school. Must be a “Utah” thing?

@T – wow, that actually makes perfect sense.

Usually, stalkers don’t ignore their prey, then wander away, then leave them to find an alternate means of transportation.

And geez– what’s so very ‘private’ about a phone number, anyway? What’s with women guarding their phone numbers as if they’re keys to the boudoir? Worst case scenerio: you put on your big-girl panties & hang up. Works every time.

Wow…just wow…and creepy

What first got my attention is that at my school we called the directory at my school stalkernet as well…wonder if a lot of schools do the same.

But I’m off topic. The guy is creepy, and a jerk, and weird, and I have to admit I’m kind of glad he did just leave. Made it possible for you to find a nice guy then

Most girls guard their contact info more than they guard their vajayjay. Going home with a stranger will most likely get you harmed than having someone look up your phone number and call you. just saying…

Well, she mentioned that she texted him back, which means he got her cell number, since landlines can’t text. Personally, giving out my cell number is a big deal for me. It’s so easy for someone’s attempts to get you via cell phone to rise to the level of harassment. I definitely remember the days when you could just look someone up in the phone book and call them, but that was when everyone had land lines. If you weren’t home, you weren’t home. You couldn’t be bothered all day, every day, everywhere. So it really took some extreme behavior for people to feel like it was “too much.” However, most people have their cell phones with them all day, every day, everywhere. So even a few innocent calls can get annoying if they’re from someone you don’t want to talk to. That’s where my protectiveness comes from, personally. I still have no problem giving out my land line (yes, I have one, it was somehow cheaper for me to have all 3 Comcast services than just the two I wanted). So, that’s my two cents on the whole phone number thing.

That said, I actually agree with Andrew regarding the way the most inane things get debated to death on this site. I guess I just wanted to chime in this time because I like to debate, and this particular debate caught my attention.

was this at SVU????? Ohh the stalkernet!

I’m going to guess that the people who are telling women to “put on their big girl panties” have never been stalked via phone calls. Hanging up doesn’t “work everytime” when the stalker calls and calls and calls, or texts and texts and texts. Society likes to blame women for getting stalkers because they don’t prevent it somehow – dressing conservatively, not being so charming, being so accessible – but then idiots get annoyed when women actually try to make it more difficult to be stalked, like keeping their numbers private from near-strangers.

I also thought it was BYU or some Utah school while reading this. Not because of the stalkernet, but because both parties were engaged within a year of the date.

Hey, OP, I’m glad this worked out for you well in the long run. I have to ask though. Did you end up with the guy who you had the crush on?

This definitely sounds like a BYU thing. Stalkernet indeed!