Dating Dude

bad date, terrible date, awful date

As a junior in high school, I worked at a local fast food chain and they hired a new student to work the grill. I was one of the few girls to work the grill and we became friendly. I thought he was very cute–tall, blond hair, blues eyes and he drove a sports car that he fixed up himself. He went to a different high school than I did so I thought nothing of it when he asked if he could pick me up from school one day. I just figured that he had half day.

When he picked me up, he looked great but his car sounded terrible. It was so embarrassing that I actually waited until all of the buses left and most of the students were gone so no one would see me. He then proceeded to use the word, “dude” about a thousand times! Hello! I am a girl.

To make conversation, I decided to tell him about a great debate we had in my history class. When I finished, he looked at me like I was talking another language, switched the subject and proceeded to tell me how he skipped school that day, like he often did.

We were supposed to go bowling but I had a better idea. I knew that this was going nowhere fast so I suggested that he come into my house while I changed and speak to my mom. They spoke while I was changing. My mom and I then talked a bit about my class debate.

He looked at me, I looked at him and he told me that he was not feeling well and asked if he could take a raincheck. I told him that was fine and that was the last that I heard of them. My mom helped me to get out of a tight spot.

Sad thing is that he dropped out of high school.

Comments (33)
zomboidJuly 21st, 2010 at 5:26 am

that’s more of a slightly awkward situation than a bad date, although being called ‘dude’ would also piss me off.

lozJuly 21st, 2010 at 6:04 am

You sound like the bad date in this case: you make him wait in the parking lot until everyone else has gone, whilst wittering on about one of your school lessons which is probably of little interest to anyone – you then make him wait with your mother (on a first date!), then when you return you exclude him from t he conversation with yet more mention of your school lesson. And calling you ‘dude’, whilst it may have been annoying doesn’t exactly constitute a terrible date.

zomboidJuly 21st, 2010 at 6:14 am

“When I finished telling me” [about the history debate] – a telling slip?

EmilyJuly 21st, 2010 at 6:16 am

I’m with Loz on this :)

adminJuly 21st, 2010 at 6:23 am

@Zomboid – Ha! It might have been our slip tho. Thanks for flagging nonetheless!

sashathebritJuly 21st, 2010 at 7:52 am

oh, boo hoo, you went on a date, talked about yourself the entire time and he didn’t like you! what a self-centered jerk! doesn’t he know the earth and sun revolve around you?!?!?!!

TheRestOfTheStoryJuly 21st, 2010 at 8:33 am

You mean I have to watch out for a history debate the next time I order fries with my Whopper?

tronnerJuly 21st, 2010 at 9:09 am

I think you learned your first lesson about guys that drive sports cars.

LauraJuly 21st, 2010 at 9:56 am

I’ve heard worse. The only thing bad about the date was that he was a hot highschool loser… the fat slob blind date in the park was better.

ThandiJuly 21st, 2010 at 10:40 am

It’s so insensitive: the poor guy only got attention from the OP because of his looks and ride.

OP, do you understand why it’s hard to sympathise with you in this case? He comes to pick you up for a date and you make them wait because his car doesn’t meet your standards, you talk about something only you’re interested in instead of finding a topic you can both relate to, and you make him wait again while you change. Couldn’t you have changed after school in the locker room? High school or not, you cannot use the excuse of youth on this one.

ThandiJuly 21st, 2010 at 10:42 am

*make him wait

MMMichelleJuly 21st, 2010 at 11:00 am

I have had people look at me funny when I’m talking about things over their head. Be glad you got out, he sounds as dumb as a sack of hammers. And there is nothing wrong at all with working fast food, but if you drop out of high school to do it….Not a great career move.

MMMichelleJuly 21st, 2010 at 11:01 am

Oh, and Thandi, I fail to see why it’s so bad she was interested in his good looks and car. No man has ever asked me out because I have a huge rack and a great smile. Oh wait, yes they do.

lozJuly 21st, 2010 at 12:49 pm

MMMichelle – the OP was the one being taught the subject in class, so naturally she would have a grasp of the debate, I’m assuming he wasn’t, so why would he have any grasp or interest in the issues? The OP was at fault for bringing up a subject he couldn’t really have a say on. There’s nothing wrong with him changing the subject, but apparently this author prefers to only talk on topics of interest to her…

rawrJuly 21st, 2010 at 1:14 pm

You really don’t know what topics interest somebody else until you, you know, bring them up. She shouldn’t have continued on this topic with her mom once she knew it flew right over his head, though.

It seems like the dude was a complete dud, but the OP definitely could’ve handled things better. Making him wait until everyone was gone, forcing him to hang around and talk to her mom, and then ignoring him while talking to her mom about a subject she knew he didn’t understand. That was a really passive aggressive way of displaying her disinterest in him.

rawrJuly 21st, 2010 at 1:17 pm

Hm, an additional thought:

She was in high school, so maybe she was in the “HOCRAP I’M YOUNG AND IMMATURE AND DON’T THINK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE VERY WELL” phase of life the vast majority of us pass through. If that’s the case though, she doesn’t make any indication of growing out of that stage and acknowledging what she could’ve done better.

But I’m putting too much thought into it at this point.

GlennJuly 21st, 2010 at 1:27 pm

OP sounds like a massively annoying person. First of all, as a history major, I know history is a beautiful, profound thing to debate, but even on a date with another history major, phd, whatever, I would never bring it up. Like you yourself indicated, you went out with him because he was cute and had a nice car. You weren’t going out with him to pick his brain about something only he knew. It would be as stupid as me talking to a date about the ways the French Colonial Empire was self-defeating – it’s interesting, under the appropriate circumstances. A date is not one of those circumstances. Moreover, you seem like you only brought that up to seem smart to him, and if I were the “dude” in question I would have also given you a bewildered look. Who tries to one-up their date in such a juvenile way? Oh by the way, people say “dude” a lot (one of my best friends, a girl, says it more than anybody I know), and I can imagine somebody saying it a lot when they get nervous (such as with a terrible date).

All this really doesn’t matter. The only truly disturbing thing is that you, to this day, believe this date was a bad date because of his reactions to your bizarre behavior on a date. But keep it up, you know you’re a winner.

GlennJuly 21st, 2010 at 1:29 pm

edit: “about something only he knew”, should be “about something only you knew”

SurrealJuly 21st, 2010 at 3:07 pm

Gotta say the OP sounded a bit snooty. For a first date I would not have brought up the debate. If I had and it flew over my date’s head I would have changed the subject… to be kind. We get the idea that the OP is intelligent or believes she is, and her date wasn’t the brightest crayon in the box (according to her). I do think she did make the right choice in not pursuing any further dates, but she should have been more courteous. Although I feel embarrassed for the boy for being put in such an awkward position.

All in all, she’s lucky that she finds this to be a “worst” date.

PandaJuly 21st, 2010 at 4:44 pm

Obviously the OP could have been more polite or accomodating, but I think that once she realized that they probably weren’t exactly compatible, since she was apparently really into school while he was more into skipping it, she just wanted a way out. And I know that when I was in high school I would have tried to find any way to get rid of this guy without actually having to say “I don’t think this is going to work.”
And, also? Just because some people are ok with being called dude all the time doesn’t mean everyone is. I say dude more than anyone I know, and I know some people really don’t like to be called dude!

LisaJuly 21st, 2010 at 4:57 pm

Ugh. I hate being called “dude”.

I’m not sure which I find more irritating– guys calling women “dude” or women calling other women “dude”. The latter, I think. It’s as affected as a dude calling another dude “girlfriend”– only that would be somewhat more endearing because of the wacky novelty. (But, that would never happen because women ape the behavior of men, never the other way around.)

But beyond that, not a notably bad date.

TronnerJuly 21st, 2010 at 6:10 pm

Ok dudes…

If this had happened in college, and the topic was philosophy, not history, I would have assigned immediate “annoying quasi intellectual” status to the person. Instead, you have a girl in high school who was probably trying to think of something, anything to talk to the douchy dude with what I presume was a camero, or IrocZ or a 4 cylinder Ford Mustang

judeJuly 21st, 2010 at 7:28 pm

@rawr Questionable behaviour and a lack of politeness is something that can be understood from people still growing up, but the fact that the OP still doesn’t seem to see how she erred in this situation, and appears to be thinking that it still is a bad date because the guy in question didn’t match her fantasy ideal guy, is irksome.

ijojuJuly 21st, 2010 at 11:38 pm

You palmed your date off on your mom. Classy.

popJuly 22nd, 2010 at 2:40 am

Glenn dude! you’re the man bro! :)

MeshellJuly 22nd, 2010 at 10:20 am

I went to a dude ranch and rode a boy all the way home.

LisapJuly 23rd, 2010 at 1:02 pm

1 – I see OP learned a valuable lesson about boys and cars: their awesome suped up vintage sports car is normally only awesome to them and everyone else sees the junk mobile it really is, won’t stop them from being really proud of it and bragging about it though.

2 – Why are people so sensitive about being called dude? Really, that is worth getting annoyed about (and not just OP I saw sever posts that agreed)? Most of the people I know often use it when referring to each other. Not constantly, but it would certainly fail to catch my attention if I was called that by someone. One of my cousins refers to all her kids as dude, the same as calling them hun, hunny, babe, sweety, or any number of terms.

MysteryGuestJuly 25th, 2010 at 9:46 pm

I hate being called dude, too, because, well…I’m not a dude. But if I was a dude, I still wouldn’t like it. Got a name.

leonotisJuly 26th, 2010 at 3:45 pm

The whole calling people “dude” thing strikes me as really immature and indicative of a teeny-tiny vocabulary. I’m w/MysteryGuest–use a name.

Allison112July 27th, 2010 at 6:06 am

I think loz and others are way out of line, here. I’m proud of you, OP, not only for safely diffusing an awkward situation, but for recognizing that you could do better. And good on your mom for helping out!

JeannieAugust 4th, 2010 at 7:51 pm

Silly, people…Have you never heard the endearing song about dudes? “I’m a dude, he’s a dude, she’s a dude, we’re all dudes, HEY!” Can’t all of us dudes just get along?

Phil JonesAugust 5th, 2010 at 5:49 pm

Ewww! What a nasty snob you are!

wrinksAugust 12th, 2010 at 1:16 pm

lol @ jeannie. i could honestly care less if a guy or a girl calls me dude

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