Multitasking

My Very Worst Date happened during my high school years. I had been spending time with this boy, M, whom I’d worked with for about a year or so. Having found myself newly single, I thought it seemed appropriate that he would become my “rebound” (not to be acted on) crush. But of course, being young and naïve, I actually pursued him anyway.

One day, I invited him to my high school’s football game, and was very excited when he actually showed up. We then spent the night holding hands and laughing with my friends. Because of how well things were going, I didn’t think anything of it when M asked for another friend C’s number and started texting her. After the football game, I said goodbye to my friends and he joined me for a movie with another dating couple. He spent the movie leaning really close to me, and I was expecting him to just kiss me. I hardly noticed him texting on his phone, but we were teenagers, that’s what we did. The night ended oddly, with no kiss or hug or anything cute from M.

After the date, I checked my phone, which had six missed calls, four text messages and a voice message, all from C, saying that I needed to call her right away as she had something to tell me. So at midnight I called her, only for her to start saying how sorry she was, and that M had been texting her all night, and actually asked her out! While I was at the movie with him! Naturally, she had turned him down.

M and I are not on speaking terms anymore.

Comments (31)
CallousedAugust 5th, 2010 at 6:47 am

meh…high school boys.

NurseDreaAugust 5th, 2010 at 8:16 am

High school boys can be such dipshits.

baronvonfAugust 5th, 2010 at 9:01 am

So you knew, going in that he was going to be a “rebound”, and you were upset, why?

popAugust 5th, 2010 at 9:37 am

yep… you just had a case of “high school boyitis”.
the weird thing is, he never tried to make a move on you during the date (the best i can see is holding hands an a perceived leaning during the movie). can’t this just be a misinterpreted date? you thinking “yay date!” and him thinking “nice! hangout w/friend”. the male gender can be very clueless.
it’s just that real “high school boyitis” would manifest with trying to score some (insert number of base here, as i’m not American and don’t completely know the conversion) action AND get a date with your friend.

ThandiAugust 5th, 2010 at 9:41 am

lol. It’s not just highschool boys, I had a similar experience last year with a grown man, we went on two dates in one week, all was well until I brought two of my girlfriends to his open invitation birthday party! He just had the audacity to keep e-mailing me for the next few asking why I’m being so cold

ThandiAugust 5th, 2010 at 9:47 am

* next few days

tronnerAugust 5th, 2010 at 10:03 am

@ Baron – Because it was rude as hell? Treating the situation like a rebound doesn’t mean a person can’t be given a modicum of respect by the guy.

baronvonfAugust 5th, 2010 at 10:11 am

So it’s ok to treat the boy with disposable “affection” that might have led to that boy developing unreciprocated feelings towards this girl. Sounds to me like a plan (karmically) backfiring.

AND- from what I read, the boy WAS respectful.

rawrAugust 5th, 2010 at 10:23 am

@baron, the OP acknowledges this was a bad idea: “But of course, being young and naïve, I actually pursued him anyway.” It seems that the OP has matured and figured out that it wasn’t the thing to do.

Repeatedly texting while you’re out socializing (with friends, a date, whatever) is rude. Whether the texter intends it or not, the behavior says “You’re not worth my attention, so I’m going to ignore you and entertain myself, okay?”.

baronvonfAugust 5th, 2010 at 10:28 am

OK. The texting was rude (ONE of the reasons why I’ve never owned a cellphone).
So seems to me that the OP is just as responsible for this MVWD.

….AND if this was her VWD, WOW! She’s led a charmed life- at least in the dating department.

MaggieAugust 5th, 2010 at 10:46 am

these stories make me feel old – we didn’t even have cell phones when I was in high school, let alone use them for texting!

hellcatAugust 5th, 2010 at 11:28 am

Agreed that the texting was rude, but you can’t be mad at someone for liking your friend when you just admitted that you were using them to get over someone else. You’re both equally liable, in my opinion.

tronnerAugust 5th, 2010 at 12:14 pm

@ baron – I agree on the charmed life. I doubt her “high school years” are far behind. And, I’m with you @maggie…the cell phones that were around “back in the day” were those giant, gray, bigger than a shoebox phones. I don’t think I sent my first text message until well after college. :(

zomboidAugust 5th, 2010 at 12:17 pm

oh no – is this going to be another 30+ comments thread?

AndrewAugust 5th, 2010 at 12:49 pm

Unfortunately it’s looking that way, zomboid…but then again it’s appeared to (hopefully) have slowed down.

MeshellAugust 5th, 2010 at 1:09 pm

I shall end it with a quick note — The OP realized she was rebounding after the rebound. I doubt she actually said “A HA! I desire affection. Let me happen upon a good friend who will be affectionate with me, use his affection, and ta daaaaaaaaaa rebound done hehe.”

She probably thought he was interesting, didn’t realize she was rebounding, and the mediocre date happened. As she matured, she realized that she was indeed rebounding and how silly it was of her to pursue a friend at that time.

I think Baron is a jilted old grandpa, what with his avoidance of cell phones and belief that we are all aware when we are rebounding. Especially a high schooler. Tsch, apparently people can’t candidly learn about themselves. To think, I was secretly aware of all the times I hurt someone when I rebound. Because rebounding isn’t painful for both parties involved.

TheRestOfTheStoryAugust 5th, 2010 at 1:12 pm

Texting, voice messages…and I’ll bet this was one of those newfangled football games where they don’t even use a fullback!

rawrAugust 5th, 2010 at 1:13 pm

I could make it a 30+ comment thread if you would like, zomboid.

Ummmm…. Okay. EVERYBODY SUCKS. EXCEPT FOR ME. Discuss.

;)

TedAugust 5th, 2010 at 1:16 pm

Was he a high school boy? She never said that. She only said she worked with him. Maybe he was older and that was why he wasn’t interested. Of course, he did like her friend, but then… that can probably be racked up to boob size…

Anyway, I don’t see how this can be a MVWD when it clearly wasn’t a date in the first place.

baronvonfAugust 5th, 2010 at 1:37 pm

I think Meshell is transfering.
The healing and living can only begin after the acceptance Meshell. So pull up yer britches, throw out the melted butterscotch candies in that soap-dish on your tv tray (they stick to your dentures anyway), turn off the People’s Court, fire up that rascal with that huge orange flag on it and go out and embrace your imperfect peppermint and urine scented life. It’s been waiting for you…. it’s time…

… and not using a cellphone does not a “grampa” make. Still quite young and lucid and technologically savvy. I just don’t want a god-damned cellphone.

Also, the OP “Having found myself newly single, I thought it seemed appropriate that he would become my “rebound” (not to be acted on) crush. But of course, being young and naïve, I actually pursued him anyway.” would suggest that the OP was fully aware that she was on the rebound. A sign of immaturity is expecting one thing from others, but not yourself.

Oh, and I’ve pooped bigger trolls than zomboid and andrew…. in the 89′s!

baronvonfAugust 5th, 2010 at 1:37 pm

that’s 80′s :)

NurseDreaAugust 5th, 2010 at 2:37 pm

I agree with meshell, only I would’ve used surly old fart (whom evidently eat trolls). I don’t think andrew belongs in the troll category. :(

baronvonfAugust 5th, 2010 at 3:01 pm

Ouch. That cuts to the quick, sir.

… and trolls are high in fiber/roughage- for the advanced digestive system.

LAugust 5th, 2010 at 3:29 pm

How dare anyone call our zomboid and Andrew trolls!

You know not of what you speak, baron von f-ed up…

It’s high school teenagers for crying out loud.

YGAugust 6th, 2010 at 12:13 am

If you’re out with someone and you’re sitting there texting for most of the time, it’s rude, no matter if it’s a date, just hanging out, at a party, etc. I’ve seen people do it, and if makes me want to smack them. Instead I just laugh inside my head and think, You’re so pathetic and incapable of communicating with the real world that you HAVE to stay attached to your phone like a life line.

It sounds like neither of these two entered into the “date” wanting more than an evening’s companionship. That’s pretty much what they got…no harm, no foul. I was afraid the OP was going to say, “So I spent the night as his place, and he never rang me again…” It makes a change and is a relief to find a story so simple.

JanineAugust 6th, 2010 at 7:24 am

zomg its not a date! zomg op you’re stoopid! zomg! zomg zomg “damn kids these days! zomg THIS is not a mvwd, I don’t know why I read this! OY VEY!

There, I think I’ve said all the stuff all the finger-waggers will say (if they have not said it already).

MVWDs are different for different folks.

NEXT!

TedAugust 6th, 2010 at 7:50 am

shut up

ThandiAugust 6th, 2010 at 5:46 pm

a date can be many things… It’s not all let me get dressed up and wait for the guy to come pick me up, take me to a restaurant kind of thing, not in this century anyway. My new boyfriend and I have never even spoken on the phone! It’s all texts, IMs, facebook, or face to face

times are a-changing!

ThandiAugust 6th, 2010 at 5:47 pm

P.S. Andrew and Zomboid are not Trolls, I like what they have to say

zomboidAugust 9th, 2010 at 7:38 am

aaaaand comment 30
yay, i’m a bona fide member of an internet comments community now – the lowest form of internet
thx guyz lol

baronvonfAugust 9th, 2010 at 3:20 pm

So- uh, I totally misunderstood the 30+ comment thing (I thought it was an age reference), so an apology is in order to Andrew and Zomboid.
My mistake. I apologize.

Looks like I’m the (not too far off 30 and nowhere near grampa) cellular-phoneless troll.

Leave a comment
Your comment