Kissing Creep
After a bout of boring dates I decided to try the online route. For two weeks I scanned profiles and enjoyed the $30.00 a month in entertainment. One day, I received an IM from a seemingly attractive guy; he had a quick wit and an interesting career in television production. One night while we were talking, he asked me to meet him at a local bar for a drink so we could cut the crap and see if we hit it off face to face. I agreed and drove to meet him. As I walked up to him outside the bar and went for a hug he bent down and planted a nasty wet kiss on my mouth, tongue included. Put off by the kiss, but telling myself to give him a chance, we walked inside and he chose a table in the corner. Quickly the conversation went helter skelter. He proceeded to tell me that I was now his submissive. WTF?! He then reached across the table and took my hand, pulled it to his mouth and sucked on two of my fingers, grinning as he did so. I kept laughing, thinking he was joking, but then he got a serious look on his face and asked me if I would introduce him to my parents.
Before I could answer with “No, you freak,” he said, “Well you’ve already been a bad girl. Why didn’t you tell me who your father was?” Turns out he’d stalked me online and found out that my dad was basically really high up for the television network he worked for and was going to use me to climb in the company while punishing me. CREEPY! Opting for an early exit I said I had to go. Afraid that he would kill me and wear my skin as a dress, I made a smooth exit by giving him a kiss and telling him I looked forward to our future together. Oscar nomination please! For the next month I ignored his texts and calls. But here’s the real kicker: about a week after that creepy date my roommate came in my room and told me she had met a cool guy online and showed me his pics and it was him! I was in some of her profile pictures with her so he must have known I was her friend. We screamed, shut the computer and turned on the house alarm!
