The Zombie Hunter

I met T on an online dating site where I had previously met a boyfriend and several platonic friends. I live in a big city but don’t have a car. At the time, I relied solely on public transportation. T lived in a totally different city, about 20 miles away. However, he attended the university that was just a few blocks from my apartment, so we agreed to meet there for lunch. The fact that he didn’t offer to pick me up and drive me somewhere was OK, since there was a strip mall type place on campus, and I figured we could get Chinese food or something.

I didn’t know where anything was on the campus, so I wandered around for a while until I found T. And he did not look like his pictures. He was still moderately good looking, though, so I figured I’d continue.

Instead of walking to where the restaurants all were, we went to the student lounge. Which would be OK, except I wasn’t a student there, and the only food place was Subway. I like Subway as much as the next person (except maybe Jared), but not for a first date. But what’s even worse is that he didn’t order any food. He ordered himself a Diet Coke (because he only drinks Diet Coke and water) and didn’t offer to pay for my drink. But I’m a modern woman, I can handle going Dutch (even though I do believe that, traditionally, whomever asks for the first date should pay, especially if it’s only a $1.50 soda).

I was feeling a little hesitant at this point, but I stuck with it because we were compatible in our emails. But the conversation lagged. I asked questions and he gave one-word answers…until he asked me about my feelings on the zombie apocalypse. I told him I didn’t have any, because zombies aren’t real. He launched into a 30-minute diatribe on zombies. It was at this point that I called it quits and left. Luckily, he didn’t try for a kiss or a hug.

He did keep texting me for a few weeks after. It hurts me to say that I completely ignored him, but I just couldn’t handle it anymore.

Comments (28)
EmilyJanuary 16th, 2012 at 4:17 am

Sounds like a pretty dull date. This particular story does read a bit like ‘Complain about something. Then say that it’s actually okay. Complain about something else. Then say that’s okay too’. But still, not the most romantic of first dates :)

EmJanuary 16th, 2012 at 5:21 am

I laughed when I read “…except maybe Jared”

CodeCartJanuary 16th, 2012 at 5:33 am

Hmmm… the guy only buying HIMSELF a drink, and then going on about zombies sounds like he was intentionally trying to cut the date short and turn the OP off because he wasn’t interested. But he texted for the next few weeks after he acted like that? What a socially inept goon!

MaureenJanuary 16th, 2012 at 6:43 am

I have found in my own experience that a lot of social inept goons can function well via email. It’s the face-to-face where they crash and burn. Can’t make eye contact.

ChelsJanuary 16th, 2012 at 7:15 am

If this is a bad date, consider yourself spared.

RosarioJanuary 16th, 2012 at 7:21 am

Okay. I don’t think it’s bad that he only wanted a soda. Um…was it really bothering you? I dunno, he sounds kind of different and maybe extreme, but I’ve had worse and more embarrassing dates.

Ben ThereJanuary 16th, 2012 at 7:56 am

She met him with the expectation of sharing lunch. Maybe her blood sugar dropped and she got crabby?

I don’t believe zombies are real, either, but love to joke about my mad skilz (e.g., baking bread and pulling splinters) that will save me after grid crash and/or the zombie apocalypse.

LittleMissSunshineJanuary 16th, 2012 at 9:36 am

How crunchy is this chick that not getting a dollar drink for free is a deal breaker? Some times a guy just wants to get to know a girl – does he have to get food? Why not walk up and buy a meal if your hungry? Do all dates have to follow a specific guideline? I would have talked about zombies too, and probably threw in some star trek to get rid of that girl.

LauraJanuary 16th, 2012 at 10:48 am

Do you people read? “we agreed to meet there for lunch” means she was expecting to share lunch with this guy, like Ben There said. So yeah, if it had been me, I would have been bothered that he only got a soda, and didn’t offer to pay for my meal on the first date. Just goes to show he’s a cheap, inconsiderate bastard. But since we all just have to bash the OP, then by all means, continue.

BeckZombieJanuary 16th, 2012 at 10:55 am

Sure, it’s not the craziest of bad dates, but it is in fact a bad date. They agreed to meet for lunch and then he just got a drink. I’d be confused and annoyed, too. As for the zombie thing, i got the impression the date actually believed in zombies. I think the OP acted fine in this story. She even admitted she should have told him she didnt want to talk rather than ignore him.

BeccaJanuary 16th, 2012 at 11:53 am

@Laura, really? Not buying someone a drink makes them a “cheap, inconsiderate bastard?” He is a college student, sure it’s only a $1.50, but maybe that is his dinner at McDonalds. Even if it’s not, we live in a society where men no longer have to pay for a woman.

bloodyneptuneJanuary 16th, 2012 at 12:20 pm

“I told him I didn’t have any, because zombies aren’t real”

Oh heeeell no. Anyone without a solid break-out plan posted in a visible location in their home, is just asking for it.

Can I get this guys email? (It’s cool, I think I can cover the buck fifty)

BillyJanuary 16th, 2012 at 2:04 pm

I’m guessing he wasn’t the only one that didn’t look like the pictures on the dating website, and he just wanted to end things as quickly as possible.

TitoJanuary 16th, 2012 at 2:09 pm

Im with Laura if the dude asked OP out he could`ve at least paid for her 5 dollar sub. If your too broke to pay for that then you shouldn`t be asking chicks out on dates imo. And the zombie thing is straight outta loserville. I mean who talks about that shit for a half n hour? Really???

bloodyneptuneJanuary 16th, 2012 at 2:16 pm

@Tito
Someone who cares about other peoples survival. She is clearly unprepared.

LauraJanuary 16th, 2012 at 2:21 pm

@Becca, I only said that because it’s a FIRST DATE. I have no problem splitting the bill, or paying for the guy; I’m aware that we no longer live in the 1950s. But I still believe in common courtesy and manners. If a guy’s taking you out on a first date, I don’t care if my soda is only $1.50, I’d be a little put off by a guy who wasn’t going out of his way to impress me on a first date. If he’s not trying hard then, then he sure as hell isn’t going to make any effort 5 or 10 years down the line either.

NattieJanuary 16th, 2012 at 2:45 pm

Maybe it’s just me, but if I’m in a lineup with a friend to buy non-alcoholic drinks (say, in a coffee shop) and I’m first in line, I’ll usually just pay for hers/his as well. It’s not because we’re on a date, or following any particular rules, it’s just a nice gesture. I’d say its rather cheap for T to not buy the drink, but also for OP to complain about it.

And yeah, no one should have to eat if they’re not hungry, but if you’ve set a lunch date …or if the person you’re with wants to eat …it’s polite to have something very small, so they don’t feel awkward eating alone.

And the zombies? Not everyone sees the point of the “what would you do if the zombies attacked” conversation. To some it’s hilarious and helps you get to know the other person better. To others, it’s just nonsensical ramblings.

JessieJanuary 16th, 2012 at 3:21 pm

I write off anyone who takes that zombie business seriously, and there are more people like that than you would think.

TillieJanuary 16th, 2012 at 3:52 pm

Listen, ladies. Sometimes a man can’t fritter away his $1.50 on something as useless as soda. Can’t you see he’s saving for the end times?

bloodyneptuneJanuary 16th, 2012 at 5:28 pm

@Tillie
I bet they don’t even have a stock pile of canned food ready, either.

DaniJanuary 16th, 2012 at 7:27 pm

I’m really awkward about first dates. If they don’t order food, I don’t order food. If I had planned to meet someone for a lunch date then I would be a little PO’d if they didn’t eat. I don’t think it mentioned him asking her out – but if he did, then of course he should have paid. If he can’t scrape together enough money for that, he probably has other things to be worrying about.

TillieJanuary 17th, 2012 at 7:23 am

@bloody
Seriously. If she’s not wearing a bandoleer of bullets as a belt, she’s probably not going to last long come apocalypse. No sense getting attached if she’s just going to end up being undead dinner.

chrisaJanuary 17th, 2012 at 9:57 am

@ tillie and neptune,
hey i’m with you guys. you never know when its gonna happen, but ya gotta have a plan. i mean most of these nay sayers have never heard of “the walking dead” so let them be a brain slurpy for the undead.

can hardly wait for “world war z”

blondieJanuary 17th, 2012 at 11:13 am

Why didn’t the OP order herself a sub if she wanted lunch? Also, ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz…

bloodyneptuneJanuary 17th, 2012 at 1:39 pm

And a Zombie Survival plan can easily be applied to an apocalypse scenario, asteroids, Cthulhu, genetically enhanced chimps.

But hey, without people like that, who’s going to run around flailing and draw the Zombies off?

PeanutJanuary 19th, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Uhh…I get this eerie feeling that I know this guy…was he tall?

His name started with a “T”…big city…OBSESSED with Zombies…would totally do something like this…not out of being an asshole, but he’s got some issues and is EXTREMELY shy in person.

TulipJanuary 20th, 2012 at 2:28 am

Hey, OP here. Totally forgot I submitted this. I agree, it is kind of boring (compared to other stories on this site) but it was my very worst date (yes, I am very lucky.)

I want to clarify: I wasn’t upset just because he didn’t buy my drink (even though he knew I was job hunting while his family was loaded). I can afford a soda, I can afford a sandwich. I was upset because he had asked me out to lunch, and we didn’t eat anything. And I’m the kind of person who was raised to wait until everyone was served before eating. If it had been a coffee date and I was hungry, I’d get a muffin. But a lunch date without eating anything? Weird.

It also doesn’t come across well in the story, but we just weren’t compatible. We’d been matched online because we liked several of the same shows and lived on Hawaii (not too many OKC users in the islands.) But other than that, we didn’t have much in common.

And who called me “crunchy”? I like that. It sounds better than social anxiety disorder (which I was diagnosed with *after* this date, and which probably added to the awkwardness.)

VeviticusJanuary 23rd, 2012 at 10:08 am

I would have ended that “date” within the first 5 minutes. Pure foolishness.

Leave a comment
Your comment