Ulterior Motives

I met this guy through a dating site and in his profile it said he was 35 (at the time I was 25).  I had just moved to the city and was excited to meet people.  He was from Australia and he looked very attractive in his photos.  We emailed each other for about a week before deciding to meet up.  He worked in fashion and it was a busy time for them so we just decided on coffee.

He told me to meet him in front of his job. As I walked up I saw a guy there.  He looked vaguely familiar.  I thought this cannot be him.  This guy had a head FULL of grey hair; the guy online had dark hair.  Ok, whatever, it’s distinguished like Anderson Cooper.  I got closer and, wow, this guy was ABSOLUTELY NOT 35.  His profile photos were at least ten years old if they were a day.  He saw me and smiled -  I then had a flashback and noticed something else: he was not smiling in any of his photos and now I knew why.  Eek.  I thought to myself, well, it’s just coffee and he may be a great guy.  This is  a new me and I’m not going to be shallow about this.

So we got coffee and were having pretty great conversation.  I was thinking, I can look past this, I really can.  Then he reached over, took my hand, and started talking about marriage.  Huh?  He wasn’t specifically talking marriage to me, just marriage in general – but on a first date it’s still a weird subject.  I wanted to get up and leave but, damn my good manners, I stayed.  Thank goodness this was only coffee and he was on a break from work, which he had to get back to.

We talked a few more times on the phone; he still kept bringing up marriage and trying to get me to come to his house.  It slowly started to dawn on me that he probably needed a green card.

January 25th, 2012 in I Lied on My Profile, Love and Marriage, Match Made In Confusion
Comments (11)
SallyWord!January 25th, 2012 at 9:31 am

Good on ya, mate. You spotted the green card scam.

NattieJanuary 25th, 2012 at 9:32 am

He’s not as bad as the foreign dude a few stories back.

Still though, lying on profile + first date marriage talk is a rather huge turnoff.

FreyaJanuary 25th, 2012 at 10:02 am

If he needed a green card surely he’d be better off trying to marry someone his own age rather who might be more interested? Maybe he’s not the sharpest tool in the box. Ergh I would be so annoyed if someone lied on their profile I think I’d march up to them state my annoyance and that I wouldn’t be carrying on with the date and march off.

cupcakeJanuary 25th, 2012 at 10:33 am

It would have been fun to smile mysteriously and then turn around and walk in the opposite direction. or perhaps walk right past him. He already lied about his photo, what else is he going to lie about?

WenchJanuary 25th, 2012 at 4:27 pm

So what exactly was the deal with his teeth then? Non-existent? Badly fitting dentures?

Never understood the ‘lie outrageously on your profile’ thing. What on earth goes through theses poples minds that they think you wont notice?

Bullet well and truly dodged there, I think.

NotCinderellJanuary 25th, 2012 at 6:33 pm

I don’t doubt that this was a bad date, but I’d also love to know what was so bad about his teeth.

LeaJanuary 26th, 2012 at 12:39 am

Hey you guys, author of this post. So a little more detail about the teeth. Let me start by saying, that I am no more vain than the average person, but I do have a thing about teeth. They don’t have to be caps straight or anything. His teeth were so far apart you could park a cadillac seville in between each one. and they all seem to have a mind of their own, they all couldn’t agree to just grow straight down.

Time may have exaggerated his looks, but that’s how I remember it.

Blueberry SconeJanuary 26th, 2012 at 1:08 am

@Wench, me neither. I went on a date with a guy who lied like hell on his profile. Like I wouldn’t notice he had more weight and less hair in person. Luckily, he was a sanctimonious prick so I didn’t even have to be shallow about not wanting to go out with him again.
And REALLY, what is with these vague dates lately?

ZakJanuary 26th, 2012 at 4:42 am

I think people lie on their profile, because at least having a girl mad at you on a date is better than being completely ignored entirely.

JessieJanuary 26th, 2012 at 7:35 pm

Ahahaha as if an Australian would want to marry an American for a green card. It is actually better in Australia, job wise etc., than it is in the US. He was probably just creepy.

NattieJanuary 27th, 2012 at 6:13 am

But since he moved to the US, it’s probable to conclude that he may be interested in staying in the US long-term …whether it’s because he doesn’t understand the economy, really wants to work for a specific fashion line that isn’t available in Australia, or just likes American accents.

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