Sib Seduction

It was in summer 2010 when Doug asked me out. We had just graduated from the same class and he seemed decent enough. When we went on our first date everything was just fine. We help hands and ate at a family restaurant outside of town. Mind you, this was a small town in Michigan so there were no fancy places to eat around. A week later he called me up on my cell phone and asked to go on a double date with his sister, Sarah. When we arrived at the movie theater it got a bit strange. Sarah made an excuse about her date not being able to make it and then said “Let’s just go see the movie and have fun!” At this point I wasn’t really freaked out or anything, I just thought Maybe she just got ditched and she is trying to be strong or something. So we watched the movie and quickly left the theater.

Doug had been a bit too touchy during the movie, if you know what I mean. My butt suddenly became a spot of interest for his hand to squeeze. At the very least it was slightly uncomfortable. After the movie his sister suddenly turned into my best friend and wanted to show me her book collection at home. So as we drove to their house (I sat shot-gun and his sister was in the back) Doug’s hand started to creep up my thigh. I had to continually take his hand away from my nether-area. When we finally got to his home -Thank god!- Sarah immediately grabbed my hand and determinedly dragged me into her room. She started to show me around the house and when she opened the door to her room, my jaw hit the floor.

She had a sex room. I am putting it nicely as I can. There were dildos decorating her shelves, whips, handcuffs, random blunt phallic looking objects. etc. There was so many things and I swear I saw a few hundred S&M books scattered here and there. Safe to say I was quite shocked at this. Who brings a girl HERE for a date?! While I was gawking at this room wondering WHAT THE HELL?! Doug was off somewhere in the great unknown of this horror house.

Then Sarah led me to the living room like nothing happened and excused herself for a restroom break. I started to formulate an escape plan. I texted my whole contacts list to just call me. I just needed someone to set off that funky techno ringtone I had, pronto. Then Doug walked in. My eyes couldn’t get any wider – trust me, this one was a doozie – Doug had on a full latex suit. I turned around and there was Sarah, in some weird latex strap contraction shirt made of straps and belts and something. Then they both asked me to join in a threesome. When my cellphone finally rang it was my friend Josie. I faked that she was a co-worker in need of help because of too many customers and had asked her to come pick me up. As I got ready to leave I apologized to Doug and his sister for not being able to er…stay.

Promising to call him when I was free, I ran out the door, jumped into Josie’s car and we drove away. As we drove away I received a text. It was a picture of Doug’s penis wrapped in a painful looking noose of some sort. Speechless, I deleted his text and blocked his number.

After a week I started to get stalked on my phone. Strange breathing/panting and moans left on my voice mails, weird texts from different numbers – I had to change my cell phone number.

Comments (32)
NoishAugust 3rd, 2012 at 4:32 am

It seems like they had staked you out and planned all this in advance. I wonder how successful their tactics have been in the past. As with traffic light window washers, all it takes is one person giving in to encourage the washers and the surprise S&M-ers to keep trying. Maybe next time you’ll have better luck and get the window washers.

BettyAugust 3rd, 2012 at 4:52 am

Okay, we all know this story is utterly fake, right?

laurenAugust 3rd, 2012 at 4:56 am

Hmm. So how long did it take between them entering the room in their S&M costumes and your friend calling and arriving in her car? Wouldn’t it have just been easier to say you didn’t want to rather than make up an elaborate excuse that suggested future willingness?

Sounds a bit fake.

EmveeAugust 3rd, 2012 at 5:13 am

I agree that this sounds fake, but God I want it to be real! Either way, I was definitely entertained, though the last part about feeling the need to make an excuse after being invited into an incestuous threesome does seem a bit odd…

Queen of NothingAugust 3rd, 2012 at 5:23 am

Surprise incest S&M threesome with toys?
Too amusing to be true…

RavenAugust 3rd, 2012 at 5:28 am

Does anyone actually believe those “emergency phone calls” on dates? “Oh noes, my aunt/brother/boss’ cat needs a kidney transplant RIGHT NOW!” Seriously?

“Sorry, I don’t do brother/sister leather combos” seems like the better way to go here.

Otherwise, great story. Even if it IS fake (which I’m not saying it is – there are all kinds of kinky folks out there) it was still a good read.

AlonzoAugust 3rd, 2012 at 5:43 am

The weakness in this story was not the S&M brothe-Sister act. it wasn’t even the lame emergency call. It was the transitional time lapse in between the open proposition, and the rescue/escape . . . but otherwise this did have potential!

PsycheAugust 3rd, 2012 at 5:48 am

*facepalm* I wish that somebody would tell people like your date and his “sister” that a fetish is not something you pull out unless you’re sure they’re “into” that sort of thing. And the same thing goes for pics of your penis.

BunnyAugust 3rd, 2012 at 5:58 am

Yeah there’s potential for this to be fun but either of those suits take a bit to put on (even with experience). Time line fail, sorry hon. Cute story though!

NattieAugust 3rd, 2012 at 5:58 am

The transitional time-lapse could merely be due to weakness in the OP’s writing, and not the truth of the story.
But I do in fact hope this story is true.

AudaxAugust 3rd, 2012 at 6:20 am

@lauren: Michigan-ians are famous for being too nice to the point of a little crazy–think Fargo.

Or am I thinking of Wisconsin?

This was a truly amusing story.

NGAugust 3rd, 2012 at 6:37 am

@Audax: Isn’t Fargo in North Dakota?

MargaretAugust 3rd, 2012 at 7:08 am

How do you block a phone number?

PandaAugust 3rd, 2012 at 7:20 am

Obviously she was pretty freaked out, and it probably would have seemed safer in that situation to make an excuse that a co-worker was coming to get you than to say you weren’t interested. I’m sure a lot of people in that situation would be frightened that they wouldn’t take no for an answer.

JGirlAugust 3rd, 2012 at 7:30 am

Fake.

DevAugust 3rd, 2012 at 8:39 am

1.) Margaret: Some providers you can do it right from your cell phone. I have to call mine (I think) and block the number. It’s doable.

2.) Might not be fake. When I worked at the adult store, an old man came in trying to return a dildo (because it didn’t come with a strap-on!) My store didn’t do returns, so I helped him find a harness to fit the dildo he already had. While I was doing so, he was leering at me, going, “I’ve been using this on my sister, but she’s 79, and a little loose down there.” Ewww. He continued, going, “And I think she’d really like you.” I just smiled, nodded, and tried not to vomit as I finished helping him. He left his number on a card on the counter, which I promptly threw away and washed my whole counter with bleach.

JayAugust 3rd, 2012 at 9:37 am

Dev, it’s not fake because it’s implausible that there would be a bro/sis like that, it’s fake because none of the timelines make any sense.. plus the idea that someone would need a fake emergency call to get away, rather than just saying “Sorry, not my thing” and leaving, is a bit silly.

SmokeAugust 3rd, 2012 at 2:21 pm

@Audax, Michiganders are about as nice as Ohioans (which is hit and miss at best) You might be thinking of Wisconsin. We do get worse come football season, IE: Wolverines vs Buckeyes….. Go Buckeyes!! :D

DaniAugust 4th, 2012 at 5:31 am

No no guys, Josie was obvs just waiting around the corner cause she knew how this shit would be going down.

SkullturfAugust 4th, 2012 at 9:07 am

The city of Fargo is in North Dakota (the eastern part of the state, close to Minnesota), but much of the action in the movie Fargo takes place in Minnesota.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fargo_(film)#Plot

DaniAugust 4th, 2012 at 11:57 am

Also why would your coworker come pick you up if she was super duper busy with customers?

LeighAugust 5th, 2012 at 6:21 am

…why is it nessecary to *apologize* for not wanting to join an incestuous S&M threesome? Just say “no” and then leave. You can call your friend or whoever to pick you up while you walk.

JabberjayAugust 5th, 2012 at 8:02 am

It sounds like Cercei and Jaime Lannister read “50 Shades.” If I’d been in OP’s shoes (real story or not) I would have barfed right then and there.

TraceyAugust 6th, 2012 at 9:28 am

People ask for a whip it out story, then when they get one (and a whopper at that), they immediately cry, “Fake story!”

You can’t please all the people all the time….

massageonAugust 7th, 2012 at 6:38 am

So wait… was the book collection she was going to show you the S&M book collection? Why didn’t you comment more on what you said to her when you saw all that. It was like sex room…books and dildos everywhere… livingroom…threesome..excuse leave. The best part of the story was LEFT OUT!!!

TulipAugust 8th, 2012 at 1:11 am

@Jabberjay, you are my hero.

Maggie MayAugust 8th, 2012 at 4:46 am

So maybe I listen to Dan Savage too much, but you are allowed to say “It’s cool that you are so comfortable expressing yourself sexually, but I’m just not into the same kinks. I’m flattered, but no thank you. I’m going to go wait for my friend outside.” Apologizing for having to leave because of a (fake) excuse is just giving the impression that you might be interested in joining them another time – the same kind of “leading on” that gets critiqued over and over on this blog. No wonder they kept reaching out to you.

SallyWordSlingerAugust 8th, 2012 at 6:47 am

I think it’s kind of laughable that so many people think this is fake. Sure this is weird and unlikely but there are strange people doing strange things all around you. You just don’t know it.

SallyWordSlingerAugust 8th, 2012 at 6:54 am

Case in point: I once came home to find my roommate had lain her boyfriend on the kitchen table wrapped head to toe in cellophane, and was eating spagetti and meat sauce off his cellophaned chest.

If you think I’m BSing, well, I can only envy your innocence. Frankly, I will smell garlic and Parmaesan cheese without thinking of them.

SallyWordSlingerAugust 8th, 2012 at 7:04 am

Rather, I will *never* smell garlic and Parmaesan cheese without thinking of them

blondieAugust 9th, 2012 at 7:57 am

I am with the people crying fake, and the people who don’t care because it’s still a good story, but I don’t see any problems with the calling her friend part. She was calling her friends to help her bail because she thought this sister was kinda weird and she was getting uncomfortable. The latex suits and threesome invite didn’t come until after she made the call. Seems pretty standard to me.

subzeroSeptember 2nd, 2012 at 3:07 pm

Umm, I am super confused why did they help hands?

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