I was 15, going on a date with a guy, Eduardo, that my best guy friend was friends with. My bestie, Bernard, and my sister were semi-dating at the time, and we all decided to go to the local carnival.

(Eduardo and Bernard went to a different school than my sister and I did.  Therefore, I was unaware that Eduardo had recently broken it off with another girl in the week before asking me out.)

It was hot, the carnival was set up on either side of a long road, and the rides were spaced out.  My sister and I were waiting for the guys to get there, when she nodded towards some girls walking by.  The girl in the lead was bull-dog ugly, and scrawny, and dressed like a boy.  She had even painted a moustache on her face.  We giggled to each other, but didnt think anything of it.

Eduardo and Bernard got there, and we got the date under way.  As we walked through the carnival, Eduardo took my hand. I really liked him so I blushed and led him to the Haunted House ride, and we did a little kissing in the dark.

When we exited, Bernard and my sister were glaring at each other. Eduardo and Bernard walked away, on the premise to buy some drinks for all of us, and my sister said that I need to be careful of Eduardo.  When I asked why, she said that Bernard just saw the best friend of the girl Eduardo dumped, and that he knew Eduardo had been talking to said ex earlier that day. Bernard and my sister agreed that Eduardo probably wasnt over that other girl yet, and that she was probably there at the carnival somewhere.

Bernard and Eduardo come back, and nothing was said (I was 15, naive, and this was the first date I had ever been on.)  We continued with the rides, even having a good time snuggling on the Ferris Wheel.

Then came the Tilt-A-Whirl.  It was my favorite ride – I was really excited to go.  I practically dragged everyone there and we waited in line. E said that he had to use the bathroom and would be back in a moment. My sister made Bernard follow him, to make sure he wasnt seeing this other girl.  Guess what? That girl, with the painted on moustache?  THAT WAS THE OTHER GIRL!  Eduardo told her to come in a disguise, so that Bernard wouldnt recognize her, and she chose to paint on facial hair and dress like a boy.  WTF!!

So, Bernard watched them kiss, and didnt say anything to Eduardo when he got back.  I took one look at Eduardo and started freaking out. My sister had a horrified look on her face and Bernard just burst out laughing.  Eduardo had black paint all over his face and lips.  I got really pissed and the three of us left Eduardo alone at the carnival.  I was so angry that I didnt look where I was going, and actually ran into the other girl.

When I saw her, I started yelling that he was using both of us. She started bawling, and her friends had to pick her up off the ground as she fell over.  As they got her up, she started screaming about how he used her as a towel after he masturbated, and that they were supposed to be having sex that night and now she would never lose her virginity. This was in front of everyone, including the police who rode bikes to keep an eye on things. It was so messed up.

She ended up being in some of my classes later in high school, and went to the same small college my current boyfriend attended. He said she was a lesbian, and that she actually wore fake beards and moustaches all the time.

And Eduardo? Eduardo managed to impregnate two sisters (one was 17, the other 15) when he  was a senior in high school.  He works for the carnival when it comes through town, as one of the games people.  Totally dodged a bullet, I do believe.

My Very Worst Date happened when I was 19.  I was young, single, and was living with a friend and no parents for the first time ever.  My roommate was heavily into online dating, and suggested I give it a try.  I protested, but when she made me a profile, I was amazed by the number of cute men that messaged me, so I gave it a shot.

My first date was with “Cal.”  He was cute, older, and nice.  We went out three times, but by the third date we both knew we wouldn’t click; so we went our separate ways.  A few weeks after that I was out at the local bar (not a great place to meet men, I know), and I met “Al.”  He seemed familiar to me, and even thought I couldn’t quite place where I knew him, he assured me we didn’t know each other.  He was nice and sweet, and so after my friend’s urging, I agreed to go on a date with him.

Three dates later, we were at Al’s house.  I was in his living room, looking at pictures he had out, when I saw Cal in a picture.  Suddenly I saw Cal in more pictures, and with horror, I realized that Al is a friend of Cal’s, whom I met at a pub night I went to on my 2nd date with Cal.  I confronted Al about it, and he agreed to my suspicions, saying that yes, he had met me when I was with Cal, and he liked me.  When he learned that we broke up, he pumped Cal information about me, and then staked out my favorite local watering hole for three weeks until he saw me there.

Pictures in his living room also revealed he had two small children, and when I confronted him about that, he admitted he did have kids, and was currently separated from their mother.

Props for his honesty, but not his stalker-like intentions.  I fled his house and never returned there, or to my favorite bar, again.  I also deleted my profile off the online site, and haven’t tried since.

I had been living in a new city for the better part of a year and had met Guy through some mutual friends. We’ve gone out casually for maybe 2 month and things seem good.  One night he invites me out to drinks and we head to this bar downtown (I live about 30 minutes away and took the train in). After we’ve settled in and ordered drinks, he says he’s gotten back together with his ex. I’m a little hurt, but–well, we were never exclusive. He gives me an out, but I decide to stay as my food’s on its way and I’m starving. Plus, I came down town in the snow. I’m getting my trip’s worth.

Anyway, after a minute he gets a call and asks if his friend from work can come by and join us. I’m excited because maybe a third party can mitigate the awkwardness and maybe if it’s a male friend he’ll hit on me! In front of Guy!

So it turns out that “friend” means “person I’m dating”. So it’s him, me, and his new girlfriend sitting together. She doesn’t realize he just broke up with me ten minutes before she got there and is sitting as close to in his lap as they can get on barstools. At this point, I’m just sitting, in awe of this guy’s ego and watching my dignity slowly wither away as I try to wolf down dinner as quickly as possible.

This might sound a little bitter, but looking back it was kind of hilarious:  They’re doing The Lean! He wants us both to taste how awful his beer is! She wants us all to huddle together for warmth as they walk me to the train!

Yes. Seriously. It’s where I drew the line and left them in the dust.

I had been dating this guy for about a month when I moved about two hours away (plans that I had made months before I had started dating him). He called and told me that he would like to come visit me during New Year’s weekend and I was extremely excited. This guy was a bodybuilder, charming, educated, everything that I wanted, plus he seemed really into me. Of course, as fate would have it, I came down with the worst flu of my life the day before he was going to be driving up. I called and let him know that I wasn’t going to be much fun during our romantic weekend. He said that it was fine, he just wanted to see my pretty face and take care of me.

Completely moved by this, I went outside to greet him when he called to ask where to park. I was wearing pajamas, slippers, and a sweater, not really thinking much of it since he knew my condition. He gets out of his car, looks me up and down, and with a snobby look on his face he asks, “That’s what you’re wearing?” Confused I said, “Um, yep, why?” He then says that his cousin was expecting us at their restaurant for this big black tie New Year’s Eve party they were throwing. I told him I had no idea what he was talking about and he said, “Oh, it was kind of a surprise but I figured you’d be dressed up since its New Years Eve.”

I was annoyed, but I told him, “Okay, but I’m really sick, so I don’t really want to stay out late if that’s okay.” He sighed and leaned on his car, apparently waiting for me to hurry up and get dressed. I came out in a dress and some flats with a sweater, he looks at my shoes and says, “So, do you not like heels? Most girls I date wear heels.” I reminded him once again that I was EXTREMELY sick and I didn’t feel like dealing with uncomfortable heels.

We get to the restaurant and we’re seated at a table with his aunt and a bunch of their ritzy friends. Tons of food is placed in front of us and just looking at it made me want to vomit. I tried to be polite and I whispered to his cousin, “This all looks really great, but I’m afraid I have a really bad flu and I haven’t been able to keep anything down.” She then announces to the room that I wouldn’t be eating because I was sick, all the while literally rolling her eyes.

My date ignores me the whole night except for a few leg gropes, and then an older lady insists we stay in her guest room because it was closer than my apartment. I, of course, decline this strange offer from a complete stranger (especially since neither of us had been drinking). My date throws a small hissy fit insisting we stay with this lady (who he had just met as well). I grabbed all the courage I could and I said, “I’m really sorry, but would much rather be in my own bed right now.” Luckily the lady understood, but my date still pouted the rest of the way home.

He even went as far as to say, “My aunt was really pissed off that you didn’t eat anything, I dont know why you were so rude.” I ignored the comment, being as I was doubled over in pain and nausea.  Obviously we are no longer dating. I had to learn that a pretty face and rockin’ bod is not enough to make up for a shitty personality.

I had only gone out with Gary a few times when a friend at work invited me to his house for a dinner party and told me to bring a date. Not only did my friend’s Russian wife make some incredible Russian dishes, but he made his own vodka. He poured all the guests a shot for a toast during the meal. I drank a shot to be polite – it was very strong and the fumes burned my eyes – but Gary started downing it like it was soda. After an hour of that he could barely stand and was hitting on our host’s lovely wife and looked like he was about to puke.

I dragged him to the car to take him home. During the 30 minute road trip he stroked my hair and stroked my face and sucked my fingers and told me he loved me and tried to drag me over into his lap (remember, I’m driving). While he had once picked me up at my apartment I had never been to his place. He directed me to the neighborhood and told me where his street was. After I had pulled into the driveway, he started dying laughing.  He said it wasn’t his house, that he had tricked me. All right-y then.

After I took him to what he swore was his house he ran inside to the bathroom and started some violent and noisy projectile vomiting and then passed out on the bed. I looked around the house: there were toddler’s toys on the floor and parenting and fashion magazines on the couch and a pair of women’s shoes by the door. Either he had “tricked” me again and this was some stranger’s house or a pissed-off wife was about to walk in and beat me with a baseball bat. I looked through the mail in the kitchen and got the address of the house and called a cab and paid the driver $30 dollars to take me back to my car parked in the city.

The next day Gary called me, apologizing, telling me he was so very very sorry, etc. I demanded to know whose house had I taken him to. He said it was his sister’s, and later said it was his mother’s, and then kept changing the subject by telling me he would do anything, ANYTHING if I gave him a chance to make this up to me. He would not take no for an answer, so I agreed to meet him at a restaurant in an hour. His avoidance of the question about the house really made me worry, so I never met him. I’d turned my cell off when he started blowing it up hours later. In his voice mails he told me I was a bitch and a cunt and he had felt sorry for me, that I looked lonely and like I couldn’t get a date (sorry, that has never been a problem for me, Romeo) and that, by the way, he was married. That was his family’s home, his wife was out of town with their two sons visiting family, he had planned to get laid that night because he knew I was easy and that he was going to get a piece off of me and then never call again.  What a lovely fellow!

Success is the best revenge:  I now have a kick-ass husband and little girl.  I’m going to go give my husband a kiss now, because he is so full of AWESOME!

Choke on it, Gary.

I had just gotten out of a long term emotionally abusive relationship. I happened to be at the auto repair shop when I saw a guy there. Every time I looked up he seemed to be watching me, which was a little creepy, especially since I had my daughter with me. He struck up a conversation and we traded niceties for a bit. I discovered that he was a therapist and he seemed nice enough. He invited me out to tea (now I must interject that he was very effeminate so I thought he was gay.) So, we met for tea a few weeks later. He still seemed gay and was very nice. I thought I had found a new gay friend. The second time we went out, he treated me to a Japanese noodle house and a musical. Still thinking he’s gay…. we go out a third time and through a random discussion I discover he’s not gay and was married before.

Things were going well though, he was nice, interesting and different. Fast forward a few months later. He was always asking me what I was feeling and how certain things affected me. He was also a “sensitive” and can read other peoples emotions and nervous systems. So, he was always telling me “I can sense that you’re feeling…” which again, was different, but to each his own. We started a physical relationship after a few months. One night after having this guy in my head all the time, I was feeling pretty sad. So, he asked me to “kiss me with your sadness” so I did while thinking “what the hell?” and he asked me what I felt after doing so. I didn’t really have an answer and he asked me if I felt my sadness turn into passion. Um… sure it did. So, then, he kept asking me to kiss him with my sadness and it just got more and more weird.

He conveniently stopped talking to me and was really busy right around Christmas. Then again around Valentine’s Day he told me that he felt himself “withdrawing” from me and didn’t “feel like he could answer my texts” We didn’t have the kind of relationship that required gift giving on those days, so I didn’t expect that from him. I had told all my friends after he gave me the pre-Valentine’s Day send off that he would be calling a few weeks after Valentine’s Day. Sure enough two weeks later I got the “Hey how are you?” phone call and I didn’t bother to call back.

P I’d moved into a new city and I was keen to make a few new friends and perhaps find a boyfriend too. I’d joined an online dating website for the first time and through there I got talking to P. He wasn’t what I’d typically go for, but he was easy to chat to and said he knew the area quite well. One evening we went for a few drinks as a kind of meet-and-greet situation that only lasted a few hours. He seemed very normal, the conversation flowed quite easily between us and he wasn’t bad looking either, so I was willing to see him again. For date number two, he invited me to go for a walk in the countryside. He said we’d make a whole day out of it and he wanted to show me the sights. It sounded like quite a nice idea, although I was worried that once out in the middle of nowhere I wouldn’t be able to just hop on a bus home if things got awkward. He picked me up, drove us to the countryside and found somewhere to park. He said we could walk to “this really cool place.” He got us lost and started complaining about sunburn. After a long walk through fields, never finding the really cool place, and with no shade (sweating and turning pink wasn’t the most attractive look for either of us), we finally made it back to the car.

“Where shall we go next? Want to get some food?” he quizzed. I was quite hungry and I thought maybe a sweet country pub somewhere could be nice. I suggested it to him, reminding him that I didn’t actually know if there was one nearby as I didn’t know this area at all and he reassured me he knew where to go. Half an hour later, we’re still driving around the countryside. I swear we were going in circles and we’d passed quite a few pubs on the way. “Are we lost again?” I asked. Turns out he had a specific pub in mind, but couldn’t remember where it was so he was driving around till he recognised it. As we reached a junction in the road he stopped, looked left and right and said, “You pick, which way shall we go?”

I panicked. “I don’t know, I don’t even know where we are!”

“I’m not moving till you pick a direction.”

“I really have no idea what’s in either direction. Do you?”

“Yeah I have an idea, but I think you should pick.”

There was a small queue of cars building up behind us now and I felt pressured. Uncomfortably I chose to go right, having no idea if that was going to lead us closer to the pub he was thinking of, or maybe he’d given up on the pub and this was some new explorer-style game that was supposed to be fun. Unfortunately, he did this at every junction in the road for the next five junctions. I told him I really wasn’t enjoying this and asked if we could just go back to the pub we’d recently passed and have food there. He sighed and agreed. The food was fine, but the conversation was no longer flowing. He was silent and I was fairly sure at this stage that he was just as unimpressed with this date as I was. Lo and behold, at the end of lunch he announced something had come up and he needed to leave. He drove me home and as we approached my driveway I thanked him for a nice day and wished him good luck with the rest of his day.

I went to turn and get out the car when he very hurriedly leaned forward and went in for a kiss. Not a little kiss, a big kiss with tongues. I was completely taken by surprise (bearing in mind the excuses to leave early) and kind of turned my head to the side so he half kissed my cheek. I didn’t know what to do next so I just got out the car without saying anything and cringed for us both when I got inside my house. A few days later he told me how wonderful the date had been and asked me if I’d noticed that he tried to kiss me. I told him that I hadn’t thought it went so well and didn’t think we clicked. He continued to text me for weeks telling me about our perfect date.

MVWD was a frequent customer at the store I worked at. He was attractive, charming, funny, and (apparently) secretly crazy. We had gone on three dates and the crazy had yet to show itself, so I agreed to a fourth date that he promised would be a “romantic night.” He picked me up at my house on time and was excited. “My friend told me about a great restaurant and I really want to take you there,” he said. What he failed to mention was that it was about 40 minutes away and he didn’t know how to get there. An hour and a half and several expletives later, we finally arrived at the restaurant.

It was less of a romantic restaurant and more of a glorified sandwich shop. I was starving and had been expecting a bigger meal, but they didn’t have any real substantial dinners on the menu, only salads, soups and sandwiches. The way it was set up was like an indoor drive through. You would order at one window then walk over to an other one with your ticket to pay. I ordered a bowl of creamy soup and he ordered a wrap. When we got to the window to pay he told me he had no money and I would have to pay. I was a little frustrated because he had made it sound like he was paying by saying he would “treat me to a romantic night,” but pulled out my wallet and paid (being an “organic” place, it was not cheap).

When the food was ready he complained incessantly about the small portions and quickly finished his sandwich. He then told me he was still hungry and he wanted me to buy him an other sandwich. I reluctantly obliged, not wanting to start a fight 40 minutes away from home. Apparently my growing frustration was showing because after he finished his second sandwich, he asked me why I was being so quiet. I tried to brush it off by saying it was nothing, but he wouldn’t drop it. Finally, I said that I hadn’t really been expecting to pay. He then went off about the fact that he always paid for everything (even though we had split the check on previous dates) and thought that for once I could pay for something. He started calling me cheep and saying that I was only dating him for his money and he deserved much better than me. He went on to say that he didn’t realize it was going to be such an expensive place or he would have paid and he had figured I would be able to afford the restaurant better than him. I still have no idea how he thought I had more money than him, but still figured I was dating him for his money!

At that point I was ready to go home and told him that. The car ride back was awkwardly silent for about 10 minutes. Then he started ranting and raving about how I had ruined his special night with all my complaining and I was a terrible person and a terrible girlfriend (apparently four dates = girlfriend to him) and would make a terrible wife. I just stayed silent hoping he would soon wear himself out. After 15 minutes of yelling, he did and the silence was back (though this time I welcomed it). His silence lasted until we got back to my place at which point he started apologizing profusely. He grabbed me by the wrists and told me that he loved me. He said I was the best thing that ever happened to him, he couldn’t imagine life without me, and that I would make a wonderful wife and mother. Then he pulled me towards him with his mouth slightly ajar and tried to kiss me! Enough was enough! I pushed him away, told him I didn’t think it would work out and got the heck out of there!

He called and texted me for a while, but every time I responded by saying that I didn’t want to see him any more and eventually (after weeks of daily texts) he gave up.

MVWD ever occurred after I split up with my ex husband. I was at my friend’s job and apparently one of her coworkers saw me and was interested. My friend called me and let me know that he thought I was beautiful and wanted to go on a date with me. I was 7 months pregnant with my ex’s child and hadn’t even considered going on dates but I figured he deserved a chance. Now he was definitely not my type (very heavy, long hair, and very weak personality) but I was willing to look over it because I was pregnant and my dating pool was pretty much empty. We went on a few dates and we did have somethings in common such as anime and manga. I ended up having my child and shortly after I invited him out to meet my friends in a public place.

We headed to the local flea market and waited for him. My date showed up on time but he dressed like I had never seen before. He came in full Cosplay attire (dressed as an anime character). I was shocked and embarrassed because he showed up in public like that and even bragged that he made it by hand. We sat down to eat at the restaurant and he puts his hand on my neck and starts rubbing in talking to me about how he wishes he was the father of my baby and that one day we would make beautiful children. I informed him that we had only gone on like three dates and that was far too early to even consider that. He shrugged it off and then demanded to hold my 5 day old son. When I told him no (told him that the baby would get upset if someone other than me held him) and went out of his way to touch my baby every time there was an opening.

My friend could tell how much he was creeping me out so they tried to help me put some distance but he refused to leave my side. He even tried to follow me into the women’s restroom. When we finally got to our cars he pulled me in for a hug and kiss and I dodged it explaining I was feeling tired. He called me for the next week leaving messages several times a day saying that he loved me and wanted me to dress as some anime chick at our wedding. Finally he left a tearful good bye on my answering machine stating he couldn’t take the space I put between us and that that he must move on.

While in college out of state, I started to casually date a guy who I thought was cute. We were seeing each other once or twice a week for about a month, and I assumed we were getting semi-serious when we had the “not seeing anyone else, are you? ” conversation. Things were going well, he had a great sense of humor, and he had always let me drive his fast car, so I was into him.

I had to pick up my sister because she came into town to celebrate Thanksgiving with me (at another family member’s house), and I decided to introduce him to my little sister. I picked her up about 9pm, and got to his house around 30 minutes later. He had said he was expecting me, but clearly, he had forgotten, thanks to the copious amounts of alcohol he had ingested. He was trashed! He proceeded to hit on my 16 year old sister, offering her tequila shots, telling her she should “come and try out his bed,” even going so far as to try and kiss her when I went to the bathroom. And this was in the first 10 minutes of us getting there! I realized he wasn’t joking and I grabbed my sister and got the hell out of there.

The next day, he called, furious that I had “ditched him,” telling me I was “selfish and rude.” I told him that he behavior was totally unacceptable, but he continued to call me and ask me to come over whenever he got drunk. Not only that, he conspicuously showed up at almost every party I was at for months after that, often confronting me in a drunken state. It ended up with me threatening to turn him into campus security for stalking behavior…what a loser!